Not the Island Again

Do you have a particular recurring fantasy that's been looping through your mind since you were a kid? I was just sitting on the couch, having a grand old time talking to Paris Hilton and David Foster Wallace on a deserted island, and shook myself out of it with the realization that I'd thought along similar lines maybe 1000's of times before. I've always had desert or deserted island fantasies. There are always highly desirable people there (not necessarily people I get along with, sometimes just people it would be fun to outwit, anyone desirable like a crush, celebrity, a real asshole, a genius brain. Any connection more compelling than an attractive face. There has to be history or at least fame involved.) For a while the fantasy centered around every boy who could possibly ever have had a crush on me appearing in a line in front of me. When I worked at Herrero it once was my entire office and I logicked us out of the weirdtastic situation, impressing all, and outsmarting the CEO (which would probably happen in reality too :) ). And the situation is never normal. We all just suddenly appear there. Maybe we were all sleeping in our homes beforehand, or just doing normal everyday errands. Some people are always freaking out. I never am. I'm always calm, rational, sane. I either save the day or at least figure out the situation so that we all can calm down and stop obsessing about how weird it all is. I will never get tired of this story.

I think I daydream a lot! People are always asking me what I DO all day, not working, and I'm definitely caught up in my head for a good chunk of it. I'm ready for some more action-packed existence now though. Went on a roadtrip with Clodagh yesterday, accompanying her on a job interview adventure, and we had some good planning-the-future talks. Sometimes it seems overwhelming to try and revamp my life again, especially when it's all so cozy and easy right now, but I've got some zest at the moment so I'm gonna run with that and remake my existence, get involved in more community stuff, network, find a job I'll really like. I registered with a temp agency this week and promptly broke down crying after the 3 hours of testing and interviewing were over, mostly because it terrifies me to think of doing boring boring office work again. Maybe it satisfies some people, I dunno, but certainly not me. Repetitive strain, fluorescent light, old coffee, chit-chat, excel spreadsheets, pit stains in my buttondown shirts, pantyhose, chipper morning smiles, a job that fills in the holes but doesn't make a difference, ack ack ack!

Now THAT'S the stuff that'll make you get old quick. Mark my words children: Office Admin Gigantic Butts. Follow your hearts and look for passion in all you do, or that butt will be your fate.