A long way off

I keep thinking about what it's going to be like far off in the future, looking back on these times. We'll all be more conscious of how alone we are, I think. Will this all have a great golden glow about it? Maybe I won't remember how often I tuned out of conversations or got tired of it all. I'll remember it as a continuous laugh track, a love affair with media, the feeling that my group of friends would never separate, we'd travel around the world together gradually accumulating more and more witty fun people. We were always on, in those days. We thought we could change all social boundaries, create things. We had clubs for a million activities and it didn't matter how unsuccessful we were at any of them because it was fun and we were brilliant brilliant.

This week is exciting. I am a creator. My story is pouring out of me like I just slit my wrists. The house is clean; I make myself tea. I go to the cafe, I buy fruit, I dance to my new Amazon CDs. I meet my friends for lunch and don't have to hurry away. I think about things more interesting than how I can possibly make this next hour go faster. I can't seem to find a wwoof position earlier than June but that's alright, at least there's a plan. In a couple more weeks I'll ask for a new temp position to last until our Sydney trip the last week of May. Another month and a half of working, another step closer to obliterating any guilt over going to Kentucky in July for another fabulous extravagant adventure vacation.

Things are going well. Work makes not work brighter by contrast. I like waking up stupid early and then taking short naps in the afternoon, it's like I have twice as many days as normal people.