Laugh, damnit!

Today has been laughably bad. I'm hungover and at work (on a Saturday morning), which is a poor starting point. Somehow I lost my keys at the bar last night, so I can't get into parts of the office. Fortunately, there was a teenager hanging out in the waiting room, so I was able to get inside the building and climb through the window into the receptionist area. I have this awful sense of abandonment, even though I know it's just my friends leading the lives they've always led, but since I no longer have someone to turn to in the space between friends, it fucking sucks! What else what else....oh I still haven't been paid. I'm supposed to be moving this month right? Wrong, universe. Perhaps you were thinking of a different reality, where someone with my educational background had a job that actually gave a shit about her well-being?

I ran into Max on the Bart. That was pretty cool. I started crying right there in the middle of the train, and he didn't know quite what to do, but then we started talking about bikes, and then we emerged into the east bay, where the sun was shining over a 70 degrees picture of happiness. He was meeting up with Colleen for a bike ride, and it was great to see her too. She was very pro moving-to-the-east-bay and I was like, Yeah! I can live in a place that's actually nice! It was depressing looking at places in SF yesterday. The rooms are either too small to fit my bed, or the apartments are dirty and/or chaotic. I need stability right now, and that means a clean peaceful chill place with room for my bed. Not too much to ask?

I can tell I'm driving my housemates crazy. I just need to get out of there. Francisco can't fill what I need, even though I desperately want him to.

Why did I drink last night?!?!?

Oh my god, I don't think this lady is even showing up for her sauna. I could've used that hour of sleep.

I have some good thoughts about improv, but now's probably not the best time to write them down. I'll do it some other, better, time. I think it's ok if I put things off today. I'll eat some strawberries, they are especially delicious right now.