Life picture: extra fine resolution

I miss New Zealand so badly right now. I had such a solid crew over there through the first break-up. I can't decide if this round is sucking so much more because of other social matters, because of extra job strain, or because things feel really final this time. I have to stop listening to chick music, it's killing me.

Anyway, I miss my crew. Maire just wrote to me and I can't wait to see her next week. Why did I ever leave? Because I wanted to build a career? Ha, who was I kidding. I'm not building anything. I'm running in place, staring at future/past/present me's sweaty back.

Aw yeah the cheesy beats of Supermen Lovers is liftin me back up. Things will settle soon. I'm going to NY in July. Mom tells me the sisters are already excited - I'm glad I have sisters. Also, campout season is starting. The first one is coming up the weekend after this one. Nature and music distract from all problems. If you distract yourself long enough, eventually it isn't a problem anymore (there might be a new one in its place though). Life keeps moving. It's a bunch of white noise from far away. Each separate pixel is a whole lot of something though.

I'm gonna buy me some IKEA love this weekend after the final stage of the move, and then see Cary sing. I desire red furniture and red love. I'm filling in the time the best I can, and waiting for the day when I can be still again.